How can I verify this very hopefully optimistic quote that Shan said in her interview with Xosha? I love it for me and want to confirm. “ 80% of people find a person that they want to spend their life with. Those who intentionally want to find a life partner, do” - Shan

Grateful to Shan and this podcast for so much of my learning in regards to relationships and more. She’s honest, inquisitive and I love listening to her! Shan always brings on amazing guests with vast perspective, she listens really well and she asks really great questions. It sounds like everybody she talks to softens a bit when they’re with her and they open up and share things we may not have known if Shan wasn’t the interviewer

I love Shan’s authentic curiosity. She provides a space where it’s easy to learn in a way that is relevant to real relationships, not the dramas of movies and romance novels. I only wish I had found this resource 10 years ago!

So excited for the old Lovers and friends now Lovers… this was a great start to a beautiful year. As always this pod is inspiring, insightful, and most of all thoughtful. Excited for what 2025 brings for Lovers 😍

So happy to be rejoining the podcast space with you. I’m excited to see this new iteration of Lovers.

I almost fell OUT when I saw that you had a new podcast up!! I love your show and have missed you and your voice!!! I hope this is the first of many more! You have added so much information, curiosity, and joy to my days. I’m so thankful that I can hear your voice again!

Thank you for the latest episode (I’ve just purchased her book!), but mostly thank you for checking back in with your followers! We/I have missed you so much and I’m glad to hear that you’ve been growing and healing and that you’ve missed us too! Stay strong and well and please come back to us as soon as you can!!

I absolutely love this podcast and your thoughtful approach too it. From a 25yr old woman, I find it very insightful to navigating womanhood and dating and feel everyone woman should hear may of these topics!

I found it weird for you as a Black Woman in the mental health space to essentially record a promotion episode for such a terrible movie created by Tyler Perry, a man who has arguably done irreparable damage to our people with the promotion of monolithic stereotypes and demeaning stereotypes of Black People for decades. You made it seem like it was too good an opportunity to pass up, but that story seems ill-fitting.

In relation to your closing notes on the Kelly Rowland episode, I would love to see you do an episode with Anna from The Crappy Childhood Fairy

Please let him be the next interview 😆

I absolutely love this podcast. I’ve learned so much and am thankful to Shan for sharing so much insight on everything love and intimacy. Beyond grateful!

I’ve been a fan of Shannon and her work for a few years. Her insight and boldness is refreshing and her knowledge and passion is greatly inspiring. Her guests are awesome contributors as well. I wish her nothing but the best!

Hi Shan, I’m not entirely new to your Lovers and Friends because I’ve seen clips of some of your conversations, but I’ve subscribed and been steadily watching on YouTube for the past couple months. I’ve been on a journey to rediscover my body and enhance the way I think about and approach sex and relationships. Your show has been an integral part of my journey, and I love the different perspectives and experiences that are shared. You are so talented and great at what you do. Thank you so much!

Shan B. is so knowledgeable and does a fantastic job presenting a topic and how she wrestled with the available facts (and any feelings that come up too) to reach a conclusion. The interviews are incredible! Shan is inclusive and well rounded. She’s not afraid to dream and reflect.

I rarely leave reviews and I’ve never left a podcast review but this one more than deserves to be my first. I have learned so much and gained so much confidence in my sexual authenticity through listening to Shan’s perspective on love and sex. This podcast is informative, entertaining, and gave me a reason to look forward to my Wednesdays. Shan thank you for being such a light in the community that is love and sex education. The conversations were responsible, enlightening, and created so many healthy conversation starters in my personal life. I’m happy for you taking a break but look forward to the moments when you come back!

Love this podcast so dearly. You take your time explaining, you back things up with facts and not just feelings, you are authentic and the guess are well chosen. Even if you are planning to take a break just know you have put something of value into the atmosphere and we appreciate it🤍

Shan I wanted to say I super enjoy listening to your podcast. So much so I sometimes save to listen while I take a Sunday drive 😆 . Wishing you and your family all the best on your next adventure. Besides gaining knowledge by listening, I really appreciate how you let your guests speak and get their thoughts/ opinions out after you ask them questions. 💕

I love this podcast and I’m sad to know you’re taking a break but I understand it’s needed. I’ve been listening since last summer and it helped me take my mind off my moms passing. It also helps me get through work ( I’m a massage therapist) so I guess I’ll have to listen to the old episodes over until you resume (hopefully)!

I’ve been following Shan off & on since her YouTube days and was over the moon when I learned she’d be coming out with a podcast. I’ve tuned in almost weekly since episode 1…absolutely incredible content. I love that Shan takes an objective perspective on the issues & topics she brings to the table & introduces us to people from all walks of life as they share their sex & relationship journeys with us. Sad to hear the show is going on a hiatus, but also inspired by Shan once again in her decision to pivot to family when her life called her to. Thank you and best wishes!!

This podcast is amazing. Full stop, period. I find that it keeps me engaged no matter what the topic is. I listen to podcasts occasionally while working my 9 to 5 and while commuting. I find that this is the only one I want to reach for because I know I’m always going to have an enjoyable listening experience (currently binging all the episodes). I want to strive to be come a better lover and friend and have similar conversations with my loved ones that they are having on the podcast. You can aways count on hearing interesting/ thought provoking guests and the afterwards reflection conversations are great too. Plus the production quality is top notch!! Thank you to the Shan and the team that puts this incredible work on. Just know you guys are making a difference. Much love, Navi

Listening to you has gotten me through some of my worst and best days.

I appreciate Shans vulnerability with not only the topics but the process of leading the business of a podcast with her family. All love and respect! The effort and grit is felt on this end! I try to do the same on The Kinship Collective Podcast! Learning from y’all!

This is one of my favorite episodes to date, not only because it relates so much to my early dating experience, but also because you and Anna were some of the first YouTubers I ever subscribed to ~10 years ago. It hit pretty hard when Anna talked about dating older men in her 20s — not because there was something wrong with her but because their attraction to her at that age is problematic. I hadn’t thought about it like that previously, and it takes some guilt away from that period of my life. Love ya Shan! -Desiree

I enjoy this podcast even though I can’t relate to 99.9% of the topics. ☺️ this most recent episode about dating older men was difficult for me to listen to. I had to listen to it in shifts. In fact, I am still not finished. I never dated anyone except my ex-husband in my 20s and I was married at 25 and divorced by 34. Now in my 40’s and single, I feel like I wasted my youth and its too late for me. Being honest, listening to this episode, and hearing the experiences of the guest, made me feel even more regretful, but it was good to hear the point of view. I just wanted to leave a review because I really use this podcast as an educational tool, although it is very entertaining it has caused me to do so much research and opened my eyes to so many topics on good sexual and mental health. I highly recommend it.

Love Dr. Brighten, so happy you had her on the show!!

This show is one of my favorite podcasts! I learn so much each time I tune in. When I first began listening my husband and I was early on in our stages of Polyamory. We’ve listened together and used it as content to spark conversations. I’ve been hooked since! The last episode I listened to gave me so much insight about hormones and gave me hope that there are alternative options to relieve my hormone challenges I’ve been experiencing. Thanks to that episode I’ll be seeing an endocrinologist for the first time!

I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THIS PODCAST. I’m not sure if you can talk about this but I’ve been in a relationship for three years now and I feel things are going downhill as the years go by. We have two beautiful kids together but prior to this relationship I had two children in a prior relationship. I have made it my main focus to build a bond in this family but it just seems our priorities are different when it comes to finances and parenting decisions, which before we had our two kids he understood where I came from handling life as a single mother before him coming into our life. Given he was a first time parent I did my best to help guild him and coach him on things but he always took it as me making him feel stupid. Fast forward to now he’s had his family involved in our personal business which give them a bad taste for me now I kept quiet with my village until now and now that my village has my back like his family has his I’m wrong he took all his stuff and left to his moms house but this is not the first or second time but at this point it’s the last. I feel like a failure but at the same time I need my peace back

I’ve been following Shan for some year now and I am so so grateful she has a podcast now. Her openness , raw authentic episodes inspire me because not only is she an educator but she truly is open and wants to learn more about people, relationships , sex among much more. I don’t know how she’s done what she has but I think she is truly the best educator , talk show host, author (enter any title ) that you could follow. Follow her if you’re looking for a real authentic take on sex and relationships among much more.

I’ve been a listener since the first episode and continue to tune in every week! I love the diversity of topics/stories and Shan does an incredible job asking questions and pulling out take aways. Even when the topics don’t apply to my life, I love listening to other perspectives and I always learn so much

I love listening to all of shan’s work. Especially when I learn so much from it to the point where I find myself sharing her Podcast with family/friends. I now prioritize my relationship’s in a different and healthier way because of this. Funny enough, when I read her book I could hear her voice as I was reading ❤️

love the format of this podcast! It's organized and it helps me understand a lot of perspectives into one idea. Keep up the good work. Thank you for sharing your journey with self-love. Your definition of fridge worthiness has given me clear language to explain family dynamics.

Shan, you constantly keep me in awe! Your spectrum of topics discussed are always so exciting to hear each episode! You literally have me crying from how passionate you describe the love between you, Jared and your daughters. How you reflect that back into your self love is so inspiring. You just restored and reminded me of a piece of self love, and just love in general. I believe that I am worthy of love but I never really understood exactly why I keep choosing the wrong love. None of the loves I’ve chosen could love me through and through with every flaw and all. I couldn’t do that for myself. You’re inspiring me to do it now! Please keep this coming!

Shan finally broke through to me and I’m giving the review. I really appreciate her as a host for the way she shares her experience with difficult feelings and experiences and is able to keep it real with herself and her guests. She’s a great conversationalist and it often feels like I’m just listening to a good chat with friends. And it’s refreshing as well to see successful people dealing with the same self doubt and relationship anxiety I feel. So thank you Shan (and Jared) for the work you put into this platform despite your busy, complicated lives.

Shan! This show is always the highlight of my week. I thoroughly enjoy learning and thinking about human sexuality and so many of your episodes are delving into important questions/conversations. My hubby and I sometimes listen together and often pause the episode to discuss our thoughts! One episode you mentioned that you wanted a Moscato-like wine recommendation and we both looked at each other open mouthed because we have a private wine service company, Sommptuous Selections (Sommptuousselections.com), where we are trying to bring the sexy back to wine! Anyways, we had a LOT to say about the bartender offering Hennessy as a substitute as obviously its not similar to Moscato at all. It appeared that the bartender exhibited some implicit bias towards you based on your perceived race (as both Moscato and Hennessy are associated with being stereotypically preferred by black people). We don’t know the whole story, but what we heard boiled our blood! Completely unacceptable for a multitude of reasons! Anyways, if you want a fun, approachable wine tasting to jump start your relationship with wine, hit us up!! If not, no worries! We truly love what you’re doing! Keep it up! PS your support of Jared’s music these past episodes are so beautiful! He is soooo talented!!

I’ve been a fan of Shannon’s for years and for some reason have just recently discovered her podcast some time this year and I’ve been doing a deep dive. She is so knowledgeable about relationships and sex, and I love how open she is about her own relationships and how she digs deep with her all her guests. Shoot I wanna be a guest!😩

I love your shows, i legit have nothing bad to say. I leave with something each episode, I’m a sahm with little to no friends. I definitely join the conversations every week. Your guest are great and relatable. I would personally love an episode about being a new mom & wife and how to find ways back to sexy time, or even just finding time together to reconnect. While wearing all the hats we wear as moms and wives. I also love how long your episodes are. Just want to say thank you for giving your time and brain to these podcasts.

The conversations are insightful, open and engaging. Thank you Shan! Ps. I LOVE Jared’s theme song for this. I’m always dancing to the beginning and end.

I haven’t even listened yet. I just saw the title of this weeks episode and audibly gasped in excitement. I’ve been telling myself to leave a review for monthsss and I’m glad my first review is about this ep. Im a huge fan and get super excited to see what you have in store for us every week

Loving the show. I’d personally love to here about love and sex on this podcast from the transgender or autistic perspective on this podcast.

Shan, I love this podcast! I really love how you structure each episode with an introduction, interview, and closing reflection. You even did an amazing job of introducing ads/sponsorships in a way that doesn't abruptly cut off your talking points. It's a very smooth transition. I have loved every episode, except for the one with Sincere, because like even you admitted I could not grab onto what he believed his reasoning for being on the show was and what he wanted to convey to us. I loved this week's episode with your parents! I have loved previous episodes where you have brought on male guests who discuss their sexual pleasures, desires, or lack thereof. This podcast is so eye opening and a reminder that we are all normal! None of us are the "only" ones to think a certain way. Your podcast gives voice to a lot of us who don't feel confident enough to speak up in this society and social media age where it seems like everyone thinks the same way, especially within the black community.

This is amazing podcast in general. This episode is super enlightening and a must listen for everyone. I have 3 points to make regarding this episode. 1. Alicia Keys and J.Cole both wrote songs that referenced Will and Jada as being the kind of love we all should aspire to have and now we are all learning that during the period of time we were using them as inspiration and motivation to fight for a relationship that looked like their’s, it turns out that they were going through it in the worst ways. It makes sense why so many people are triggered by all of this. 2. Shan’s parents very candid interview in conjunction with what we are learning about Will and Jada’s relationship speaks to the most important ingredient to relationship longevity and that ingredient is commitment to the relationship. Having true commitment to a relationship means putting a priority on figuring out how to make the relationship function as best it can under the current circumstances and ignoring how things may have changed for the worse. People who are truly committed will make a way even when the way is not pleasant. 3. Interviewing your parents for the purpose of helping your audience to have a better chance to achieve healthier relationships is the kind of podcast and journalism work that is worthy of all kinds of awards and accolades so Shan please let us know where we can submit this episode for the awards that you want to be considered for. Shan scolded me for leaving a review and not providing my info so that she could reciprocate the love. For the record, I intentionally left out my info because I didn’t want to distract from my genuine admiration for her and the podcast. But I’m not getting scolded again so to check out the podcast version of me check out “The Cultured Misfits” podcast and for the DJ version of me “djsilk12” on Mixcloud.com and all of my links can be found in my bio on instagram @djsilk.

To be honest, I look forward to new episodes every single week- it’s become somewhat of a ritual. You guys are doing great work , super inspired by you Shan! Thank you💜

Great content! Great conversations! Valued insight!

Shan’s curiosity and passion for intimacy is helping me level up sooo much! I’ve been a day one! Listened to everything and even Enjoy the Podcast! Shoutout to the whole fam from Xya to Los! Everybody is part of this lovers and friends Framily!! I’m tryna get adopted!!!! ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

This episode really affirmed in me that not dating right now is the best thing for me. I tend to do the same where I try to show and give the person the best of me to ensure that they stay but ultimately they never do and realizing maybe it had nothing to do with me and all to do with them. Brenden has really done his own work! I’m also glad you touched on the “fast love” Bc 1 I really wanted that therapist at the end of the episode and 2 I agree women are taught to think that the man will say all the right things only to leave you hanging. Love you love your work please don’t stop

One of my favorite podcast. I love the constant evolution that we get to experience with Shan. It’s a perfect balance of fact, personal and opinionated information. I’m a person who lives and operates on facts and sometimes I need help understanding those difficult and unsaid emotions I am experiencing as an adult who is still finding herself and looking for that healthy balance in life. Love you Shan you inspire me in so many ways. Thank you, the work you do is valued and important.

This episode was an ear Gand and an experience, like every other time. I truly love the intimacy and depth of thought of Brendan and you Shan. Thank you for starting my Saturday.

Hey Shan! Wow let me just say I have tried to write a rate and review for awhile but every time I think about you reading it in the podcast I get nervous because I hope it’s as insightful of a review as you are in the podcast. I have been a faithful listener and tune in weekly via audio. As a fellow podcaster myself I admire your techniques for interviewing and structure in how you put together the show and the way you can mix things up effortlessly despite the chaos around you. This week’s episode was particularly interesting for me because it allowed me to unpack some things about myself that I hadn’t given too much thought to before in respect to “chasing the fireworks”. This podcast is in my weekly rotation of podcast listens and I don’t plan on changing that any time soon! Also my podcast is called Grown Up with Derric Holland if you don’t mind giving it a listen and providing feedback from a fellow independent podcaster I would truly be grateful. Thank you for being an amazing example for independent and immigrant podcasters and creators!

This show is everything. It talks about anything from internal to external situations and feelings. Always leave with an ah-ha moment and I love it!